Oh my dear. I relate to this so deeply. I had a similar experience as a kid. My parents thought we were supposed to have a dog because that’s what people did when they lived in suburbia. They had no experience with animals and got me a golden retriever and said here, take care of her. I was 7. This story is too long to tell here but it didn’t end well. As soon as I was an adult I made sure I had a dog in my
life. I haven’t been without at least one animal companion in 43 years. I can’t imagine life without their wisdom and love. I feel so fortunate to know that life is better with four-legged family members. Love to you Robin, as always. xoxo
I can feel your heartbreak and rushing grief is impossible
I heard something today that lightened an ancient grief that I have been carrying.
“ when we are holding something that is very heavy, we can’t set it down alone, but when we share it, it says if we’re reaching out for others to help us set it down” grief seems to be like that needs to be shared so others can help us set it down and its own time.
Dogs give us the most amazing gift of unconditional love. I’ve had several over the years and I it’s heartbreaking when they’re no longer in our lives. My current dog is a chihuahua mix who has such a funny sense of humor. He’s getting older and I want him to be my funny boy forever. All the dogs I’ve had have saved my life, gave me purpose, love and family. They are truly angels with fur🩷🐕
Oh, Robin, how complex, the story of love and loss and love. I’m sorry for these layers of grief, and the painful memory of Snowflake. We’re all “used dogs, low mileage” in one way or another.
Oh Robin, I’m so sorry for your loss. And for the childhood wounds that cut so deep. I too have a used dog, he came with all kinds of trauma from being intentionally poisoned (requiring surgery) and being shot in the head with a pellet gun. I’ll never understand why people can be cruel to animals, let alone other people. Sometimes it feels like too much. I hope you find comfort in the memories of the good times with your dogs. ❤️
I’m so sad that your experience with Smowflake broke some of your trust in yourself Robin. I hate that we hold our furry (feathered, finned and scaled) companions lives in our hands. I hate the guilt I know I will carry always for fearing—knowing?!—I will not know or be ‘enough’ to repay their love... and I will still pay that price of admission to life. I wish you what comfort there is in your memory of love.
I’m so sorry about Snowflake, such a burden to bear at the tender age of 6.
We’ve had dogs and cats for years. All beloved, though some more than others, but all live a good life with us. I hate saying goodbye when the time comes, but I’ve never regretted making that decision. I loved them too much to let them suffer and I couldn’t stand the thought that any inability to let go would cause greater suffering.
It is hard to lose a pet. We have had cats for many years, some I loved more than others. But the time comes when inevitably they leave us. Take as long as you need to mourn the loss of Moose. He may even be watching over you from the other side.
So deeply touching and complex. Sometimes when we love a being who is even less powerful than we are when we're children, our emotional fate becomes intertwined with theirs. I love that you never gave up on the whole dog idea when you grew up and had children. Thank you for sharing this intensely lovely, loving, and sad essay. xo
sending so much love, Robin. Your experience with Snowflake brought back so many memories -- a little Dalmation cross called Patch who I was told had run away early one morning (even very naive not quite 5yo me smelt the lie), then a Jack Russell who was sent to 'a farm' to have a better life. I've never had dogs since, but cats who have brought love and quirkiness. I've struggle with that 'right time' decision for another being -- impossible -- but you made the decision in love and Moose knew what it was to be loved.
Robin. I don't have words after reading this, except how my heart broke alongside yours, multiple times. These griefs (and loves) deserve their voice. Thank you for venturing to share with us.
Robin, I’m so sorry for your loss and I feel this viscerally. Parents can really suck. You and Snowflake were both subjected to cruelty. It isn’t your fault. I have similar traumas and blame myself, but it’s not our fault. We were kids. And you are doing everything you can now to make their lives better and you are full of compassion. I know you are grieving and please know you are an amazing human who makes the world a better place for so many of us, and you are loved unconditionally.
My husband and I are dog people. We currently have an 8-year old beagle daughter we adore. We've raised her to be a proper young lady, sweet and gentle, super smart and tri-lingual. Well, except when we have company and she greets them jumping on them howling and yelping like she's being murdered. But then she calms down and it's back to normal. End of story.😄
Oh my dear. I relate to this so deeply. I had a similar experience as a kid. My parents thought we were supposed to have a dog because that’s what people did when they lived in suburbia. They had no experience with animals and got me a golden retriever and said here, take care of her. I was 7. This story is too long to tell here but it didn’t end well. As soon as I was an adult I made sure I had a dog in my
life. I haven’t been without at least one animal companion in 43 years. I can’t imagine life without their wisdom and love. I feel so fortunate to know that life is better with four-legged family members. Love to you Robin, as always. xoxo
Beautifully written
I can feel your heartbreak and rushing grief is impossible
I heard something today that lightened an ancient grief that I have been carrying.
“ when we are holding something that is very heavy, we can’t set it down alone, but when we share it, it says if we’re reaching out for others to help us set it down” grief seems to be like that needs to be shared so others can help us set it down and its own time.
Thank you for sharing snowflake with us
Dogs give us the most amazing gift of unconditional love. I’ve had several over the years and I it’s heartbreaking when they’re no longer in our lives. My current dog is a chihuahua mix who has such a funny sense of humor. He’s getting older and I want him to be my funny boy forever. All the dogs I’ve had have saved my life, gave me purpose, love and family. They are truly angels with fur🩷🐕
Big hugs for you in your sorrow.
Oh, Robin, how complex, the story of love and loss and love. I’m sorry for these layers of grief, and the painful memory of Snowflake. We’re all “used dogs, low mileage” in one way or another.
Oh Robin, I’m so sorry for your loss. And for the childhood wounds that cut so deep. I too have a used dog, he came with all kinds of trauma from being intentionally poisoned (requiring surgery) and being shot in the head with a pellet gun. I’ll never understand why people can be cruel to animals, let alone other people. Sometimes it feels like too much. I hope you find comfort in the memories of the good times with your dogs. ❤️
I’m so sad that your experience with Smowflake broke some of your trust in yourself Robin. I hate that we hold our furry (feathered, finned and scaled) companions lives in our hands. I hate the guilt I know I will carry always for fearing—knowing?!—I will not know or be ‘enough’ to repay their love... and I will still pay that price of admission to life. I wish you what comfort there is in your memory of love.
I’m so sorry about Snowflake, such a burden to bear at the tender age of 6.
We’ve had dogs and cats for years. All beloved, though some more than others, but all live a good life with us. I hate saying goodbye when the time comes, but I’ve never regretted making that decision. I loved them too much to let them suffer and I couldn’t stand the thought that any inability to let go would cause greater suffering.
It is hard to lose a pet. We have had cats for many years, some I loved more than others. But the time comes when inevitably they leave us. Take as long as you need to mourn the loss of Moose. He may even be watching over you from the other side.
So deeply touching and complex. Sometimes when we love a being who is even less powerful than we are when we're children, our emotional fate becomes intertwined with theirs. I love that you never gave up on the whole dog idea when you grew up and had children. Thank you for sharing this intensely lovely, loving, and sad essay. xo
sending so much love, Robin. Your experience with Snowflake brought back so many memories -- a little Dalmation cross called Patch who I was told had run away early one morning (even very naive not quite 5yo me smelt the lie), then a Jack Russell who was sent to 'a farm' to have a better life. I've never had dogs since, but cats who have brought love and quirkiness. I've struggle with that 'right time' decision for another being -- impossible -- but you made the decision in love and Moose knew what it was to be loved.
Robin. I don't have words after reading this, except how my heart broke alongside yours, multiple times. These griefs (and loves) deserve their voice. Thank you for venturing to share with us.
I am so sorry.
Robin, I’m so sorry for your loss and I feel this viscerally. Parents can really suck. You and Snowflake were both subjected to cruelty. It isn’t your fault. I have similar traumas and blame myself, but it’s not our fault. We were kids. And you are doing everything you can now to make their lives better and you are full of compassion. I know you are grieving and please know you are an amazing human who makes the world a better place for so many of us, and you are loved unconditionally.
My husband and I are dog people. We currently have an 8-year old beagle daughter we adore. We've raised her to be a proper young lady, sweet and gentle, super smart and tri-lingual. Well, except when we have company and she greets them jumping on them howling and yelping like she's being murdered. But then she calms down and it's back to normal. End of story.😄