I cried. This is just too sweet and just too true, and beautiful. As a trans, non-binary person (assigned male at birth) it is exactly what happens with my partner's grandchildren. We just get each other and the desire to nurture runs strong. Gender be damned; better off, freer, where we are.
What a lovely, heartwarming story, Robin! I also love that you are able to reflect on it without second-guessing your decision not to out yourself. One of the hazards of being an activist is the tendency we have to feel guilty about not using every possible waking moment as a call to action, so it's comforting and refreshing to see acknowledgement that it's OK to sometimes have an interaction where we just let things be, and appreciate the richness of a pleasant exchange with strangers. I'm so happy for you that you got to have that moment of temporary tiny community with people who didn't question who you say you are. It's beautiful.
Activism can take many forms. I suppose I hadn't thought about that pressure to out ourselves in order to serve that activism but you're right, I have absolutely felt that. And in this case maybe my activism was simply being myself, being seen, and allowing that to be enough. All I really know is it felt good.
This is the best thing for I’ve read in ages. So full of joy and the beauty of being human and seeing the beauty in others. May I include this in my “But What Can We Do?” good news section this weekend - as a link to your essay, Robin?
I'm glad you had this beautiful and affirming experience, Robin. I feel like this whole family could tell you are a wonderful father.
I would have been so frustrated, I think, by the third time they brought up gender - do they think their baby is only going to trust people based on binary gender? That's so closed minded.
I've heard the same thing usually when I pet people's dogs, who are more likely to be scared of men, or the way I look at it, the dogs are more likely to be scared of people who look and act like those who have mistreated them. I've worked with rescue dogs so I get it. But the dog is not analyzing my gender when evaluating my safety, really, it's the dog's owners who are gendering me.
I'd much prefer a dog owner to say something like, wow, you look like a safe and friendly person who's good with dogs, rather than, my dog only likes women, not men.
But anyway, I really appreciated you telling this story! It's great to hear a positive, lovely story about being trans! It's so important to share these kind of beautiful, everyday, life is good stories about being trans because this is the kind of visibility that hopefully helps people understand trans people are just people too. Thank you for sharing!
The way that others consider and respond to gender is fascinating. Perhaps people like us are mirrors holding up a reflection that allows others to see themselves, to see this funny feedback loop they are caught up in. And once you see it you get to decide whether its in control.
I cannot stress the importance of sharing trans joy loudly enough. So glad to have you here to share it with!
Robin, this is wonderful. How lovely to simply be accepted - may we all be as non-judgemental as Bebe.
As a trans girl, the biggest joy in life now is just being visible and alive; thanks for this little moment <3
Awwww…thank you for sharing this, and for your warm heart.
Wonderful and celebratory -- the world defiriitely needs this.
A beautiful moment, Robin.
This is wonderful and beautiful. Your joy and kindness radiate. Thank you!
What a lovely and sweet story Robin. I think that perhaps Bebe was a wise little soul who loved you as you were.
I cried. This is just too sweet and just too true, and beautiful. As a trans, non-binary person (assigned male at birth) it is exactly what happens with my partner's grandchildren. We just get each other and the desire to nurture runs strong. Gender be damned; better off, freer, where we are.
What a lovely, heartwarming story, Robin! I also love that you are able to reflect on it without second-guessing your decision not to out yourself. One of the hazards of being an activist is the tendency we have to feel guilty about not using every possible waking moment as a call to action, so it's comforting and refreshing to see acknowledgement that it's OK to sometimes have an interaction where we just let things be, and appreciate the richness of a pleasant exchange with strangers. I'm so happy for you that you got to have that moment of temporary tiny community with people who didn't question who you say you are. It's beautiful.
Activism can take many forms. I suppose I hadn't thought about that pressure to out ourselves in order to serve that activism but you're right, I have absolutely felt that. And in this case maybe my activism was simply being myself, being seen, and allowing that to be enough. All I really know is it felt good.
This is fabulous - what a sweet, perfect, transcendent moment... ;)
This is the best thing for I’ve read in ages. So full of joy and the beauty of being human and seeing the beauty in others. May I include this in my “But What Can We Do?” good news section this weekend - as a link to your essay, Robin?
I'd be honored if you'd include it! Yes please!!
I'm glad you had this beautiful and affirming experience, Robin. I feel like this whole family could tell you are a wonderful father.
I would have been so frustrated, I think, by the third time they brought up gender - do they think their baby is only going to trust people based on binary gender? That's so closed minded.
I've heard the same thing usually when I pet people's dogs, who are more likely to be scared of men, or the way I look at it, the dogs are more likely to be scared of people who look and act like those who have mistreated them. I've worked with rescue dogs so I get it. But the dog is not analyzing my gender when evaluating my safety, really, it's the dog's owners who are gendering me.
I'd much prefer a dog owner to say something like, wow, you look like a safe and friendly person who's good with dogs, rather than, my dog only likes women, not men.
But anyway, I really appreciated you telling this story! It's great to hear a positive, lovely story about being trans! It's so important to share these kind of beautiful, everyday, life is good stories about being trans because this is the kind of visibility that hopefully helps people understand trans people are just people too. Thank you for sharing!
The way that others consider and respond to gender is fascinating. Perhaps people like us are mirrors holding up a reflection that allows others to see themselves, to see this funny feedback loop they are caught up in. And once you see it you get to decide whether its in control.
I cannot stress the importance of sharing trans joy loudly enough. So glad to have you here to share it with!
I am so glad to be here with you sharing trans joy!