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I wish more people were honest about how much of writing entails staring off at nothing while thinking through a scene or a memory or a character arc or a conversation you want to write down.

It took me five entirely different drafts and six years before I finally wrote a full cohesive draft of a memoir. It happens when it happens.

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Ugh, the staring phase. I have done so much of that. And then life interferes and we have to start all over again.

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Life. So rambunctious.

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This was extremely relatable. Shit getting realer.er as you peek under the bandage… whew, you can laugh or you can cry, huh? You’re a great writer. Your words will find a home. I can’t wait to see where.

Also, this made me think of this bit by Rilke, which has brought me strength in similar times:

“Perhaps everything terrible is in its deepest being something helpless that wants help from us. So you must not be frightened if a sadness rises up before you larger than any you have ever seen; if a restiveness, like light and cloudshadows, passes over your hands and over all you do. You must think that something is happening with you, that life has not forgotten you, that it holds you in its hand; it will not let you fall. Why do you want to shut out of your life any uneasiness, any miseries, or any depressions? For after all, you do not know what work these conditions are doing inside you.”

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Wow, that is one powerful quote. I can see why you're drawn to it. Thanks for sharing it here. It feels like a lot of what I've experienced in this process, as though the depth of feeling, even the hardest feelings, is significant in a way I hadn't given it space to be before.

And also thank you for the kind words. Encouragement goes a long way for all of us.

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I love Rilke! This is a great passage.

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Wonderful to read your experience and makes me feel more human - Thankyou.

I’m supposed to be writing a business book. I thought I would have it finished by now with all this time off work being sick. Spent all of today asleep mainly. Guess being sick isn’t really the time as cannot dedicate consistently any energy or brain cells to it! Back to work next month - aaaaaargh!

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Well. Sick time is technically for healing and resting, but I get the desire to use that time for other things. And I'm a big fan of sleep, so I support your body doing its thing right now.

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Really highlights how long we can need to just break into the process and how non-linear it always is. Great piece -- realistic and true. Thank you.

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Yep. I truly think this is not spoken about enough, so when newer writers face these hurdles they seem insurmountable. I've found a lot more folks here on substack talking about the writing process in a way that makes it feel more accessible.

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This was a great emotional roller coaster! I was in the feels with you all the way. I agree with your confident outlook - I’m sure it will get published, and until it does, I’ll be here cheering you on from the sidelines.

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Thanks, Jude!

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Thank you for sharing this journey. I’m excited to read this memoir when it’s ready.

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Thanks, Macey. I'm still working away at it.

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Day Four. I felt that.

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It felt relatable even in the moment.

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I'll bet that you are not experiencing anything different than any other author goes through. Your book will happen when it is supposed to.

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I think you're right about that.

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The world needs all our voices. Keep going, at a pace you don’t break yourself or your relationships ❤️ We’ll wait.

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Based on what you have written here, I have no doubt that your finished memoir will be a profoundly wise and poetic work of art and truth. You are so talented at arranging words in a way that communicates things that can not be communicated in words. I hope that makes sense.

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It does make sense, and thank you. That was very kind of you to say. I'm just going to believe that you're right, because that sounds so nice.

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Beautiful. The struggle is so sweet and real.

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I think we all know it well.

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I can't think of words (it's late, I should be sleeping). Thanks for writing and sharing. <3

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